How Not to Dress: Venus Williams

I like tennis quite a lot. I played it all through high school (and got to go to State my senior year, which let me tell you, was not nearly as exciting as everyone made it out to be), and still play on occasion with my friends or with my dad. I also love to watch tennis. Most people don't really like watching tennis since it's not the most thrilling sport ever, but I think the best part of it is that tennis is really more of a mental battle than a physical battle. More often the played who is more mentally composed wins in the end, upending other, stronger players.

The other part I like about tennis is the fashion aspect. In the past few years tennis players have decided that they needed to start dressing up to go play tennis, and the results have been both inspiring and vomit-inducing. Tonight, for example, I turned on the TV to watch the 2nd round match of the Australian Open featuring Venus Williams, and I almost had a seizure and keeled over.
It's awful. Terrible. It's the worst thing to ever appear on television. The yellow is all wrong. The cut is all wrong. The style is all wrong. The skirt is all wrong. There are zero redeeming qualities about this dress. Even worse is what you can't even see in the pictures... the flesh-colored undies. More than once my eyes were assaulted with shots of Venus bending down to get something from her tennis bag and it literally looked like she wasn't wearing anything under there. How on earth can playing with a wedgie be comfortable? I just don't get it. I'm going to go to bed and cry now. My poor eyes.

Sorry I sound like such a grouch tonight. I probably wouldn't be in such a sour mood except for the fact that Venus ended up winning, despite losing the first set and dealing with an injury (I'm not really a Venus fan, can you tell?). So the day after tomorrow she gets to play again, most likely in something equally, if not more, hideous.