TIME OUT

[via]

A guy walked into the liquor store...

Sounds like the beginning of an awesomely bad joke, but instead it's the beginning of the story that hopefully will not set the precedent for my night.

-----------------

A guy walks into the liquor store. My liquor store. The place that I have worked off and mostly on for 4 years. The second job I work, the one that I work over 45+ hours a week at. IN ADDITION to the 30 to 35+ hours that I work in the daytime at the courthouse--a job that for the next 4 weeks I will get paid for, but for the last 6 months I have worked for free. Let's not forget I work at the liquor store and the courthouse and balance grad school... Have I told you how fucking crazy my schedule is? I squeeze life in when I can, and usually it is between the hours of 12:30AM and 6:00AM. Can you say #FML? I can. Sometimes I say it a lot.

So back to the shitshow of a story.

This guy walks into my liquor store, shortly after my arrival and start of my 5PM-12AM shift. If I remember correctly he buys a Powerball and a MegaMillions (of which HEISNEVERGOINGTOFUCKINGWIN)... if that wasn't his purchase, then it was a pack of cigs, but I'm pretty positive it was the lottery tickets.

He buys them, I sell them. He is on his way.

I go get food about 20 mins ago (around 6:30ish) and while I'm socializing with the guys at the sushi place next door, I go to the bar to make myself a cup of crack (aka unsweetened iced tea--for real, this shit saves my life) and I see the guy sitting across the bar from me next to another customer (who is a regular lottery buyer at my liquor store). As I walk down to get a cup for my crack I hear the guy talking... I tune in and realize that the MotherFucker is talking about ME! Saying how I act like my job is so hard, when I just have to sit behind the counter at my computer and bla bla bla. He literally just kept going on and on about it--about ME! I walked by him twice and he just kept on talking.


As I fill my cup of sustenance up to the brim, I say loudly: "Hello, I'm right here, but sure, just keep talking about me." He doesn't even look up from him CrackBerry, he just keeps on talking shit. And I, I walk away.

Now I don't know if he heard me or not, and usually I'm pretty good about dealing with people who are assholes to me while I'm working. But I was in someone elses place of business, I was a customer--who often gets discounts because of knowing the owner and because of where I work--I wasn't going to make a bigger scene.

But WHOTHEFUCK does this guy think he is?! I don't know him. His comments were just RUDE.

ruderuderude
RUDE
rude

I didn't realize how much his words hurt me until I got back to the store, grabbed my cash, and went to pay for and collect my food.

He really hurt my feelings.

-----------------

Fast forward/rewind to five minutes ago: 

The regular customer (the one that the ShitTalker guy was sitting next to), who I now know as Tony, walked by the store.

I was going to let him walk by, but as soon as he passed I changed my mind and called him back over to the store.

I proceeded to tell him, pretty calmly (I'm really proud of myself for my calm demeanor) that the comments that his friend made were RUDE and completely inappropriate. It was at this point where we formally introduced ourselves to one another, and then took the conversation back inside the store and finished it. 

I told him that normally I can shake comments off, but the fact that his friend heard me (Tony confirmed this, because HE heard me say something to to guy), and just kept on going, and then the location in which his friend felt it necessary to shit talk me were wrong.

Tony said "Yeah, I had a feeling I wasn't going to get by here without you saying something..." and "I'll say something to him."

I closed with saying it wasn't his place to say anything to his friend, but his friend needs to know that talking crap about someone in front of the person, and in a place where that person always goes, and making off based judgements about a person is WRONG. StraightupNOTfuckingCool.

-----------------

Now I'm closing this post with some much needed laughter from one of my favorite movies: The Jerk starring Steve Martin.

The Gas Station Scene

"These cans are defective!'

-----------------

oh yeah,

and lastly...

FUCKtheHATERS

DoucheBags.

THE BRUISE THAT STARTED IT ALL...

I think the headline says it all.

And well, I'm pretty sure this bruise speaks for itself:

Let me just tell you...

When the first question out of a guy's mouth at the social was:
"Do you play rugby?"

All I had to do was lift my skirt (a little),
flash them my BRUISE!
and guess who got a FREE DRINK!

MEEEEEEE!



p.s. it looks 10x's uglier/more awesome today!

Q & A

via Formspring...

Height...! I'm pretty picky about height, being a tall girl, so I'm going to put it at the top of my list of qualities.
I'm very big on honesty. I don't like to be lied to or lead around. Just be straight forward with me.
I guess I should say that I like a guy who will make the first move (be it asking me out, or for my number, etc.)... I'm horrible at reading signals. If you're into me tell me,or show me, just make sure I catch your drift. I do have pretty serious blonde moments, and they tend to happen when I'm around guys that I'm attracted to.
Laughter is good. I like a guy who is able to laugh at himself and make me laugh as well.

Do you have a question for me?

Ask me on my formspring or in the box on the right hand side of the the blog.

RIGHT NOW

Source: serenityandstyle.blogspot.com via Ashley on Pinterest

Trying to figure a few lot of things out in my life right now.

I may be taking a break--I just haven't decided what to do.

TEXT-LATIONSHIP

I'm currently involved in a text-lationship... or so I would like to call it with this guy--I'll call him Rocky, like the Colorado Rockies.

Rocky and I text, and then we don't text.
I am honestly not too sure how I feel about the whole text-lationship but what I do know is this:

He say "Hmmm" all the time during our texts and it makes me want to punch him in the face.

Why? you ask.
Because every time he says "Hmmm" it reminds me of the movie The Dark Crystal. You know the one, the movie with the Skekies, the crazy whimpering things that go "Hmmm" in their loud high pitched voices.

Every time he messages me I have the damn voice from the movie in the back of my mind...

"Hmmmm"

Seriously, it sounds like this:




This text-lationship, which is going no where (for too many reasons to count), is DRIVING me crazy!

I can't bring myself to be rude and say "Dude, stop texting me," honestly because he lives in another state, AND maybe because I enjoyed his company the last time I saw him. The odds of me seeing him again are very slim, especially since I'm moving back to MD for grad school. 

I don't know what to do.
There is SO MUCH MORE to this story that I'm not sharing... I'm bad.
I'll have to share more later... maybe when we text again... whenever that may be.

Maybe I should stop this text-lationship. The whole wanting to punch him in the face is probably a REALLY BIG SIGN.

Maybe.

PHONE NUMBER FIASCOS!

So... I NEVER GIVE MY NUMBER OUT. EVER. It's just a personal thing I do not like to do. Long before the ex-bf became an ex, or even became my bf, I never liked giving my number out. It was crossing a personal boundary that I never wanted to cross.

Well two weeks ago I broke my rule. I decided to cross my personal line in the sand and do the deed. Little did I know that this would turn out to be the worst decision ever, and the best stalker story ever!

I was out in the Newark bars with S&S, the night of my homage to Top Gun, when I saw this guy in the bar whom I used to go to Towson with.
Back in my single days of living in the dorms I bumped into this cutie baseball player a few times--Let's call him RedSucks, due to his ginger hair coloring and baseball playing status. Every once in a while I would see RedSucks in my building or on campus, and once in a blue moon I would ride the elevator up with him.
Well 4ish years later I see RedSucks in the bars of Newark. What a coincidence... and how Weird! I tell the girls the story of how I have seen this guys before, and of my former college freshman girl crush on him. They finally convince me to go say hi. After an hour or so of scoping him out, and being the volunteer EVERY TIME to go get drinks for our table, I manage to bump into him and say: "Hey this might sound weird, but did you go to Towson? Because I think you might have lived in my building."
The conversation that follows... I am not proud of, oh well truthfully I am, just because I pulled it off so well and nonchalantly.

RedSucks: "Yeah I did. What building did you live in?"
Me: "Tower B."
RedSucks: "No way! I lived there. What floor did you live on?"
Me: "The 4th floor, what about you?"
RedSucks: "The 5th floor. That's so crazy."
Me: "Wow, that is crazy."
RedSucks: "So what are you doing here?
Me: "Oh, well I'm just up here visiting a friend. I live close by so I said I'd meet up with her."
RedSucks: "Where is close by?"
Me: "About 20 mins from here."
RedSucks: "No way! Me too!"

We chit-chatted a bit more about where we lived and what we were doing now--during break and post graduation. After a few mins I said I had to get back to my friends and that I'd see him around...
I returned to the table with our drinks and shared my story with the girls... who all agreed that I had to give him my number. I tell them it's against my rules... it's not my thing, yet they persist. As we go to leave the bar and head downstairs to the next bar they convince me to do it. And the little voice inside me, who adamantly dislikes and disagrees with phone number giving backs down a little and says: "Why not?!"

So I do the deed. I give him my number and say: "If you're ever in town and want to hang out give me a call sometime." RedSucks replies: "Alright. sure. See you later."
The group I'm with heads downstairs and that was that. I honestly didn't think I'd get a call or a text back, or any other type of response... but 4 days later I did.

RedSucks texts: "Hey, it's RedSucks from Kildares, a bunch of friends and I are going out to Newark tonight, do you want to come hang out?"
After a few mins I respond: "Sure, I was already planning on going up there tonight with some friends, but I can break off and meet up with you."
So we made plans to meet up later, after I got off work, at the bar below Kildares--Grottos.

10:00PM rolls around and I get into Newark. Grottos is packed so I text RedSucks and tell him I'll be upstairs at Kildares, and to text me when he is around. He gets back to me at 10:30PM and says that he is leaving his friends house...
12:00AM Comes and goes and I've heard nothing. At this point I tell myself I'm done with this guy. Truly, I'm neither mad about the situation or upset about it; honestly I'm indifferent about it... I'm just fine and dandy hanging out with my friends at the bar. Well the girls were not as okay as I was about the situation. They decided that I needed to text the guy and see where he was or what was going on... so I texted: "Are we still meeting?"
12:45AM arrives and no word. We head down to Grottos, grab a few drinks and chill. Stacey goes to the bathroom... I'm chit-chatting with Steve and his friend when out of the corner of my eye I see RedSucks! No shit! I swear.
I am just a bit annoyed and more so buzzed and not caring that I make no effort to get RedSucks attention. I don't care. His loss. Next!
Stacey comes back and I tell her what she missed. She is livid that the guy is/was there and that he never got in touch with me. "Really, I don't care" I say. She replies... "What about the bouncer guy? He was nice when we walked in, and cute too."
True, he was. He said I had a nice smile when he carded me and gave me my wristband. "Eh, why not. I'll do it. Watch my drink, I'll be back"
If those are not someones famous last words, or the last words of a girl who goes off with some stranger and gets her head lopped off by a crazy axe murderer I don't know what else they are...

I go up to bouncer guy, who will FOREVER be known as TheStalker!, and chat him up a bit. He seems really nice, down to earth, funny, but midway through the conversation, AFTER I gave him my number, I figured out that I wasn't feelin' it. There was just something itching in the back of my mind saying: "eh, nevermind, my bad."... I say see you around, he says: "I'll call you later."

(BAD SIGN!!! This is foreshadowing to some craziness if I've ever read/seen/heard it before)

We leave around 1AM, I get home around 1:30AM, he calls shortly after that. I'm in bed with a glorious buzz from the Cranberry&Vodkas and the DoubleLongIslands and almost asleep. I DO NOT ANSWER the phone. He leaves a message (of course).

The next day he calls at 7PM. I can't answer--it's my 1st day at the new job, I can't answer the phone and get bitched at or possibly fired.
1:30AM HE CALLS and leaves a message. I'm sleeping--I worked from 9AM to 9PM at the new job--I'm SLEEPING--HELLO!
I listen to the message on my way to work: "Hey it's me TheStalker!, I just thought I'd call and say hi. I guess you're a little busy. Call me back later. Bye!"
The next evening... I'm at work--7ish PM he calls again. Same story, I can't answer.
1:55AM HE CALLS AGAIN AND LEAVES A MESSAGE. Wtf? Does he not know that it's bed time?!
The message follows the gist of the last one. His voice is quite chipper and excited. Maybe my voice recording is turning him on... GOOD JESUS I hope not! "message...It's TheStalker!... message...message... okay, I'll talk to you later."
Day 3: He calls AGAIN around 7ish... he's like clockwork.

What the hell have I done?
I'll never give my number out again, this is CRAZY!!

Saturday arrives. TheStalker! hasn't called me since Thursday at 1ish AM. I'm on my ski vacation. I don't have a care in the world, other than not killing myself on the slopes. I've decided if he calls me I'm going to let one of the guys answer the phone. I'm beyond creeped out by this Stalker of a guy. I know having one of the guys answer is a complete cop-out, and is probably the RUDE-est thing ever, but I don't know what to do. I can't answer or call him back because I can't be mean to the guy. He is CLEARLY into me and he was so nice, but DAMN he is creeping me out!
I'm in the middle of my ski lesson. It's 5ish PM and he calls. He leaves a message: "Hey it's me TheStalker!. I've tried to call you a few times (YEAH RIGHT YOU LIAR--YOU'VE CALLED ME A BILLION TIMES!!!!), and I guess you are busy. (He sounds not so chipper this time--eh whatever.) Give me a call back when you get some time. I'll talk to you later."
Well, so much for my plan of getting one of the guys to answer. Dammit.

Sunday night: Saints vs. the Vikings. Around half time I work up the cajones to text TheStalker!. Is it bad that I had him programed into my phone as DO NOT ANSWER?! Nah, I didn't think so either. I text DO NO ANSWER, i.e. TheStalker!, and say: "I'm sorry that I haven't been able to answer your calls but I've been working or sleeping. I'll get in touch with you as soon as I get some free time."

What does he do?! He texts me at 1 AM and says "Ok".

Oh me-Oh my-Oh. I will never give my number out again!
What the hell!?